Eight Ponderables
1) Why would anyone knowingly eat edible petroleum products? You know, fake soft serve ice cream and that compressed faux whipped cream in a can.
2) Why would anyone drink the breast milk of a hairy 2000 pound animal? I'm talking 'bout milk, cow's milk that is and all of it's associated by-products, like frozen fat, I mean cream mixed with refined sugar and cottage cheese, which looks more like lumpy mucus.
3) If your girlfriend crosses the floor and joins the government, leaving your Alberta Party...I mean Reform Party...I mean Alliance Party...I mean CCRAP in the lurch, is your relationship over?
4) Why are Bridesmaid's dresses usually ugly? I think the Bride does this so that she looks better than her female friends.
5) Who invented the tuxedo and why? It's just an ugly thing.
6) I should like golf, being half Scottish and all, but I don't. I will admit that it is far more difficult than it looks and that playing it is immeasurably better than watching it, so I have to ask, why would anyone watch golf on TV? That has to be the most important question of the last 100 years.
7) There's a blog called Dating Help for Men. In a recent post, they have a "quick list of little things to look out for before you even attempt to go near a woman." These include such things like, oh, showering, brushing your teeth, using deodorant, etc. It seems to me that if you have to be reminded to do that, you don't deserve a girlfriend. Right?
8) What's the fascination with Star Wars and Lord of the Rings?
Technorati Tags: petroleum products, milk, relationships, bridesmaid's dresses, tuxedo, golf, Dating Help for Men, Star Wars, Lord of the Rings
5 comments:
Last year when I went to my husband's brother's wedding, I looked better than the bride! No kidding, she had the pouf deal going on!
In reference to number 4: my friend recently expected me to cough up $200 spur of the moment for her stupid wedding and a dress I'd never even seen. The thing is, anyone who knows me as a friend (and we barely see each other and aren't very close) knows that I am a.) POOR and b.) not into that wedding crap. I actually had to tell her no.
In reference to number 7: I've been on that site and I have got to tell you: That guy is a complete moron. I mean, I had to tell you just in case it wasn't too apparent. I left him a little piece of advice about how his help should probably include not lumping men and women into stereotyped categories or subscribing to traditional gender roles and assuming you know what people want and treating people like individuals, and what do you know? The guy thought I was telling him that the way to a woman's heart is through your wallet. I don't know where he got that. Jackass.
Here's one that makes me crazy...Why did they start to change perfectly good words? Why is unload now off-load.
Thought I'd drop by and say hello after your lovely comments on my site.
Regarding men dating, you would be surprised what men need to be told... Really surprised....
Regarding critical darling, I have never heard of anytime where a bridesmaid had to fork out for her own meringue. I am sure many do, but the 'etiquette' dictates that you dont, particularly if you do not get along that well.
I especially lose my sympathy for dairy consumers as I listen to our tiny little calves cry for their mums and the milk that should be theirs, instead of being trucked off to human cities while these babies suck formula from a dirty trailer (see my latest post).
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