Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Deeper into Facebook: Feathered Hair

Someday, Facebook will be banned from workplaces because it has a crack-like effect. I delve into it at lunch or during a break to see if I can uncover some familiar names or faces. There are the inevitable questions of just what exactly constitutes a friend in cyberspace, especially those you may not have seen in 20 years. Just because you knew someone, are they actually your friend? Strictly speaking, if I only added friends, in the true meaning of the word, I'd have about three friends, not the 28, or so, that I actually have at present on Facebook.

In the reality sucks part of life, I stumbled upon a certain alumni group from my high school, in which someone has posted a number of scanned images from one of my old yearbooks. The fashion disasters are rampant, dudes! I am constantly stunned by how we were all so easily duped into accepting certain fashion ideas, like feathered hair.

I had feathered hair and most of my friends had feathered hair. One could even say that, beyond the group of army cadets, most guys and girls in my school had feathered hair. This was one of those rare times in the history of civilization when men's and women's hairstyles were virtually interchangeable. And, we all know who to blame: it was Farrah Fawcett Majors.

The girls wanted to look like Farrah and the guys obviously felt that the only way to achieve any kind of relationship with her was to copy her hairstyle and try to date girls who were copying her hairstyle. But, feathered hair suited me back then: my hair was lustrous and soft and full and rich and feathery, even mellifluous.

There must have been lots of hallway conversations about hair, like:

George: What kind of hair?

Jerry: You know, long dark hair.

George: Flowing?

Jerry: Flowing?

George: Is it flowing? I like flowing, cascading hair. Thick lustrous hair is
very important to me.

Jerry: 'Thick lustrous hair is very important to me,' is that what you said?

George: Yeah, that's right.

Jerry: Just clarifying.

George: Let me ask you this. If you stick your hand in the hair is it easy to
get it out?

Jerry: Do you want to be able to get it out or do you want to not be able to
get it out?

George: I'd like to be able to get it out.

Jerry: I think you'll get it out.


I had planned an extensive discourse on velour, but that will have to wait for another day. OK, off to a meeting.

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4 comments:

Jay said...

Hehe, wow, I feel like I'm some sort of Hair AA group.

tweetey30 said...

ZF I have to say I remember my mom having my hair cut that way too when I was a kid but you know what it never stayed that way for me. I would always end up just brushing it back and nothing would happen. LOL.. I dont know why she just didnt cut my hair short on all sides.

Anonymous said...

Oh man, that's just way too funny. A similar conversation could be had about whether or not you could see the person's eyes. This goes for both men and women.

Facebook has sucked us in too. Even J, who denounces all my blogging, is fighting me for the computer now.

Super Happy Jen said...

I heard on the news that government workplaces are thinking of banning facebook. And yes, everyone you know is your friend, but not people you don't know! I have people I've never heard of giving me friend requests.