Come on Over?

In the most shocking news I have heard lately, the National Association of Recording Merchandisers (NARM) has released the Definitive 200, a list of "200 ranked albums that every music lover should own." I think they made a mistake, and accidentally included some albums that deserve a spot on the Infamous 200, or albums that no one should own.

Last night, on some insidious show like E Talk Daily, they reviewed the Canadian artists on the list. I was shocked, appalled, disheartened, stunned, and pissed off when I discovered that the top ranked Canadian album was Shania Twain's Come on Over which ranks at number 21. WTF? Even worse, Celine Dion came in at #97! These people have no idea.

Shania is an awful and horrific blend of Donny and Marie. This new country thing is so old and boring and unmusical. Please decide if you are country or pop, because this middle ground is not doing anybody any good.

I can't understand how Celine Dion has managed to make a career out of screaming, and I can't pass up the opportunity to use a quote I read on McBickle Eyes the Transom in this post: "Celine Dion looks like a beautiful woman after she's been assaulted." That's very funny. My father once said "Who doesn't like Celine Dion?" That says it all.

Even more astonishing is the fact that Neil Young's Harvest came in at 98. This is simply perplexing. Neil Young is without question the most influential Canadian musician of all time and it is ridiculous that throwaway acts like Twain and Dion (the shrill voice of Air Canada) should place higher than him on this stupid list.

Other omissions are glaring. I would argue that Leonard Cohen is perhaps the best living lyricist, and yet, no Leonard Cohen album made the list. In my opinion, Songs of Leonard Cohen is the best Canadian album ever recorded.

Other things that irritate me about the list is that the Clash's London Calling comes in at 96. It belongs in the top 10 or even top 5. It scores only a few places better than the soundtrack to Dirty Dancing. Are they crazy? If this hasn't convinced you that the people who compiled this list are on drugs, this will: Shakira made the list! Christina Aguilera made the list! Michael Jackson came in at #3! Meatloaf made the list! Queen made the list! Beyonce made the list! Mariah Carey made the list!

So, here they are:

1. Beatles – Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band – 1967
2. Pink Floyd – Dark Side Of The Moon – 1973
3. Michael Jackson – Thriller – 1982
4. Led Zeppelin – Led Zeppelin IV – 1971
5. U2 – Joshua Tree –1987
6. Rolling Stones – Exile On Main Street – 1972
7. Carole King – Tapestry – 1971
8. Bob Dylan – Highway ‘61 Revisited – 1965
9. Beach Boys – Pet Sounds – 1966
10. Nirvana – Nevermind – 1991
11. Pearl Jam – Ten – 1991
12. Beatles – Abbey Road – 1969
13. Santana – Supernatural – 1999
14. Metallica – Metallica – 1991
15. Bruce Springsteen – Born To Run – 1975
16. Prince – Purple Rain – 1984
17. Ac/Dc – Back In Black – 1980
18. Rolling Stones – Let It Bleed – 1969
19. Doors – Doors – 1967
20. Grateful Dead – American Beauty – 1970
21. Shania Twain – Come On Over – 1997
22. Who – Who’s Next – 1971
23. Stevie Wonder – Songs In The Key Of Life – 1976
24. Fleetwood Mac – Rumours – 1977
25. Pink Floyd – Wall – 1979
26. Alanis Morissette – Jagged Little Pill – 1995
27. Norah Jones – Come Away With Me – 2002
28. Eminem – Marshall Mathers Lp – 2000
29. Outkast – Speakerboxx-Love Below – 2003
30. Dr. Dre – Chronic – 1992
31. Beastie Boys – Licensed To Ill – 1986
32. Guns ‘N Roses –Appetite For Destruction – 1987
33. Dixie Chicks – Wide Open Spaces – 1998
34. Miles Davis – Kind Of Blue – 1959
35. Eagles – Hotel California – 1976
36. Def Leppard – Hysteria – 1987
37. Soundtrack – Grease – 1980
38. Marvin Gaye – What’s Going On – 1978
39. Beatles – White Album – 1968
40. Soundtrack – Saturday Night Fever – 1977
41. Jimi Hendrix – Are You Experienced? – 1967
42. Beatles – Revolver – 1966
43. Boston – Boston – 1976
44. Bon Jovi – Slippery When Wet – 1986
45. U2 – Achtung Baby – 1991
46. Whitney Houston – Whitney Houston – 1985
47. Led Zeppelin – Led Zeppelin Ii – 1969
48. Dave Matthews Band – Crash – 1996
49. Rolling Stones – Sticky Fingers – 1971
50. Green Day – Dookie – 1994
51. Led Zeppelin – Houses Of The Holy –1973
52. Joni Mitchell – Blue – 1971
53. Elvis Presley – Elvis At Sun – 2004
54. Aerosmith – Toys In The Attic – 1975
55. Lauryn Hill – Miseducation Of Lauryn Hill – 1998
56. Bruce Springsteen – Born In The U.S.A. – 1984
57. 50 Cent – Get Rich Or Die Tryin’ – 2003
58. Ac/Dc – Highway To Hell – 1979
59. Notorious B.I.G. – Life After Death – 1997
60. Van Halen – Van Halen – 1978
61. Green Day – American Idiot – 2004
62. Black Sabbath – Paranoid – 1971
63. Eminem – Eminem Show – 2000
64. Jewel – Pieces Of You – 1995
65. Coldplay – Rush Of Blood To The Head – 2002
66. Meatloaf – Bat Out Of Hell – 1977
67. Usher – Confessions – 2004
68. Kid Rock – Devil Without A Cause – 1998
69. George Harrison – All Things Must Pass – 1970
70. Billy Joel – Stranger – 1977
71. Eagles – Hell Freezes Over – 1994
72. Van Morrison – Moondance – 1970
73. Rem – Automatic For The People – 1992
74. Phil Collins – No Jacket Required – 1985
75. Metallica – Master Of Puppets – 1986
76. Faith Hill – Breathe – 1999
77. Johnny Cash – At Folsom Prison – 1968
78. John Coltrane – Love Supreme – 1964
79. Pink Floyd – Wish You Were Here – 1975
80. Michael Jackson – Off The Wall – 1979
81. Marvin Gaye – Let’s Get It On – 1973
82. Bob Seger – Night Moves – 1976
83. Paul Simon – Graceland – 1986
84. Linkin Park – Hybrid Theory – 2000
85. Prince – 1999 – 1983
86. Def Leppard – Pyromania – 1983
87. Janet Jackson – Control – 1986
88. Red Hot Chili Peppers – Blood Sugar Sex Magik – 1991
89. Dire Straits – Brothers In Arms – 1985
90. Tupac – All Eyez On Me – 1996
91. Matchbox Twenty – Yourself Or Someone Like You – 1996
92. Red Hot Chili Peppers – Californication – 1999
93. Led Zeppelin – Physical Graffiti – 1975
94. Nelly – Country Grammar – 2000
95. Creed – Human Clay – 1999
96. Clash – London Calling – 1979
97. Celine Dion – Falling Into You – 1996
98. Neil Young – Harvest – 1972
99. Soundtrack – Dirty Dancing – 1987
100. Dixie Chicks – Home – 2002
101. Tom Petty – Full Moon Fever – 1989
102. Van Halen – 1984 – 1984
103. Soundtrack – Titanic – 1997
104. Crosby Stills & Nash – Déjà Vu – 1970
105. Tlc – Crazysexycool – 1999
106. Beck – Odelay – 1994
107. Kenny G – Breathless – 1992
108. Nwa. – Straight Outta Compton – 1989
109. Sex Pistols – Never Mind The Bollocks – 1977
110. Beatles – Rubber Soul – 1965
111. Radiohead – O.K. Computer – 1997
112. Simon & Garfunkel – Bridge Over Trouble Water – 1970
113. Dixie Chicks – Fly – 1999
114. Metallica – And Justice For All – 1988
115. Michael Jackson – Dangerous – 1991
116. Mariah Carey – Daydream – 1995
117. Soundtrack – Top Gun – 1999
118. Elton John – Goodbye Yellow Brick Road – 1973
119. Police – Synchronicity – 1983
120. No Doubt – Tragic Kingdom – 1995
121. Rolling Stones – Beggar’s Banquet – 1968
122. R Kelly – R – 1998
123. Tool – Lateralus – 2001
124. Oasis – What’s The Story Morning Glory – 1995
125. Bob Marley – Exodus – 1977
126. Journey – Escape – 1981
127. Christina Aguilera – Christina Aguilera – 1999
128. Jay-Z – Blueprint – 2001
129. Alicia Keys – Diary Of Alicia Keys – 2003
130. Soundtrack – O Brother Where Art Thou? – 2000
131. Cars – Cars – 1978
132. Enya – Day Without Rain – 2000
133. Natalie Cole – Unforgettable With Love Natalie Cole – 1991
134. Soundtrack – Footloose – 1984
135. Lionel Richie – Can’t Slow Down – 1983
136. Sarah Mclachlan – Surfacing – 1997
137. Bonnie Raitt – Nick Of Time – 1989
138. Metallica – Ride The Lightning – 1984
139. Sheryl Crow – Tuesday Night Music Club – 1993
140. Frank Sinatra – In The Wee Small Hours – 1954
141. Earth Wind Fire – Gratitude – 1975
142. Zz Top – Eliminator – 1983
143. Willie Nelson – Red Headed Stranger – 1975
144. John Lennon – Imagine – 1971
145. Toni Braxton – Toni Braxton – 1993
146. Etta James – At Last – 1961
147. Elvis Presley – Elvis Presley – 1956
148. Cat Stevens – Tea For The Tillerman – 1970
149. Smashing Pumpkins – Mellon Collie & The Infinite Sadness – 1995
150. Dave Brubeck – Time Out – 1959
151. Janet Jackson – Janet – 1993
152. Queen – A Night At The Opera – 1975
153. Ozzy Osbourne – Blizzard Of Ozz –1980
154. Will Smith – Big Willie Style – 1997
155. Prince – Sign Of The Times – 1987
156. Public Enemy – It Takes A Nation Of Millions To Hold Us Back – 1988
157. Bob Dylan – Blood On The Tracks – 1975
158. George – Michael Faith – 1987
159. Boyz Ii Men – Cooleyhighharmony – 1993
160. Destiny’s Child – Writing’s On The Wall – 1999
161. Jay-Z – Black Album – 2003
162. Avril Lavigne – Let Go – 2002
163. Fugees – Score – 1996
164. Madonna – Like A Virgin – 1984
165. Led Zeppelin – Led Zeppelin – 1969
166. Stevie Ray Vaughn – Texas Flood – 1983
167. Stone Temple Pilots – Core – 1992
168. Original Cast – Phantom Of The Opera Highlights – 1988
169. Jethro Tull – Aqualung – 1971
170. Tupac – Me Against The World – 1995
171. David Bowie – Rise And Fall Of Ziggy Stardust – 1972
172. Shakira – Laundry Service – 2002
173. Soundtrack – Forrest Gump – 2001
174. Al Green – Call Me – 1973
175. Curtis Mayfield – Superfly – 1997
176. Live – Throwing Copper – 1994
177. George Benson – Breezin’ – 1976
178. White Stripes – White Blood Cells – 2001
179. Lynyrd Skynyrd – Pronounced Leh-Nerd Skin-Erd – 1973
180. Sade – Diamond Life – 1984
181. Fleetwood Mac – Fleetwood Mac – 1975
182. Paul Mccartney & Wings – Band On The Run – 1973
183. Beyonce – Dangerously In Love – 2003
184. Anita Baker – Rapture – 1986
185. Nas – Iiimatic – 1994
186. Barbara Streisand – A Star Is Born – 1976
187. Earth Wind Fire – That’s The Way Of The World – 1975
188. Anita Baker – Rhythm Of Love – 1994
189. Jay-Z – In My Lifetime Vol 1 – 1997
190. Ll Cool J – Mama Said Knock You Out – 1990
191. Steely Dan – Aja – 1977
192. Willie Nelson – Stardust – 1978
193. Aretha Franklin – Sparkle – 1976
194. Andrea Bocelli – Andrea – 2004
195. Bob Dylan – Bringing It All Back Home – 1965
196. Luther Vandross – Never Too Much – 1981
197. U2 – All That You Can’t Leave Behind – 2000
198. Rush – 2112 – 1976
199. Outkast – Aquemini – 1998
200. Grand Funk Railroad – We’re An American Band – 1973

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