Ouch

I walked into a door this morning. Yes, it's true. In my defense, the door moved. I was preoccupied, or at least that is my excuse. I just turned around and wham, my head hit the edge of the door. I think the wind moved it or it bounced back from the wall. The worst part is, I have a gash on my forehead. You might mistake me for a pugilist. I think I should start wearing my bicycle helmet around the house. So far, there are no signs of concussion. No headache, dizziness, or vomiting. And, there is no sign of confusion or memory loss, or none more than usual.

We have been watching Dennis Potter's The Singing Detective (on DVD, of course). It is really interesting and unusual.

Happy Friday.

Tags: injuries

I Get Spam

Today, I got this:

"Hi, it's me Kimberly... my fiancé is on a business trip I have a on-line profile you can check it out...if you are looking for a sexy relationship we can meet each other http://www.hotladiestodate.com/899394/cheatinghousewifeservices/fullpage.html"

Sounds promising. Speaking of spam, I often get strange email messages from Chinese exporters of all kinds of beans. Why me, I ask. I have written back, informing them that I am not a great consumer of beans, but I have gotten no reply. Maybe they know something that I don't?

I have often received those Nigerian fraud messages. You know, I am the son of so-and-so and if you give me thousands of dollars, I will give you even more in return, once I pay something to someone for something. To these people, I have been blunt. I'd post examples of my replies here, but it might offend you. Oddly, they have not replied either.

My favourite spam has to be the one that promises an end to spam simply by purchasing their product. Would you buy spam blocking software that was advertised via spam? I think not.

Tags: spam

I am tired of work right now. I did take vacation, but it just doesn't seem like it was long enough. I am completely lacking in motivation. Fortunately, I have the kind of job where no one notices if I do anything or not. I wonder if I can smuggle a cot into my office so I can take some naps.

Tags: work

I just read that Perdita Felicien fell in her hurdles event. So much for that gold. This is terrible news. Other than that, I have nothing to say today. The truth is, I am too lazy to write anything more.

Tags: Olympics, Perdita Felicien

Believe it or not, until yesterday, I had been to the CNE only once. That's mostly because I was not born in Toronto, and did not move here until I was an adult. The CNE reminds me of an oversized fall fair, the kind I went to often as a child, so it holds a lot of nostalgia, even if I was never there as a kid.

The other thing that made me nostalgic this year was Destroyer, the KISS tribute band. I watched them do a three or four songs. When I was ten years old, I got my first KISS album. My only defense is that I was ten years old. Now, I find the music very one dimensional. Inexplicably, their biggest single was Beth. I don't get that at all. Why is it that hard rock and metal bands always score huge hits with power ballads? Someone please explain that to me.

By the way, my first album was Goofy Greats. OK, so I didn't always have impeccable taste in music, although I thought I did. Please remember that I was ten years old. It featured these classics:

Snoopy & the Red Baron - Royal Guardsmen
Itsy-Bitsy Teenie-Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini— - Brian Hyland
Bread & butter— - Newbeats
Mule Skiner Blues - —Fendermen
Rockin’ Robin— - Bobby Day
Alley-Oop— - Hollywood Argyles
Loop De Loop— - Johnny Thunder
Yummy, Yummy, Yummy - —Ohio Express
Little Green Bag— - George Baker Selection
The Lion Sleeps Tonight - —Tokens
Surfin’ Bird— - Trashmen
Chewy, Chewy— - Ohio Express
Ahab The Arab— - Ray Stevens
The Name Game - —Shirley Ellis
Green Tambourine— - Lemon Pipers
Simon Says— - 1910 Fruitgum Co.
Mah-na-Mah-Na - —Piero Umiliani
See Ya Later Alligator - —Bill Haley
Beep, Beep— - Playmates
The Birds and The Bees - —Jewel Akens
Nashville Cats— - Lovin’ Spoonful
Mr. Cluster— - Larry Verne
Bony Moronie - —Larry Williams
1, 2, 3 Redlight— - 1910 Fruitgum

OK, so maybe they weren't classics.

By the way, I am not sure anyone could get away with writing a song called Ahab the Arab today.

Tags: CNE, KISS, music

The Olympics

I always enjoy watching the Olympics. But, during the past two or three games, I have felt that something is missing. I think that the collapse of the Soviet block has killed some of the excitement. It was far more interesting when the West was up against the East.

The other thing is that there are far too many events now. If it were up to me, I would get rid of rhythmic gymnastics, boxing (it is both brutal and stupid), equestrian (either that, or award the medals to the horses rather than the riders), sailing (what's next, auto racing?), trampoline, synchronized swimming (aka smiling under water and looking goofy), and synchronized diving. Oh, and I would insist that we stop any notion of making golf and ballroom dancing Olympic events. They can't be serious.

I am also irritated by CBC coverage. There is way too much commentary and too many talking heads. I am tired at looking at Brian Williams and I am tired of his voice. Everything is on tape in the evenings, and they just pile on the garbage. Last night, I had to endure a documentary segment on Greek dancing. Why? CBC, please just show the events!

Tags: Olympics, CBC

I'm a bit surprised by the furor over the bikini-clad dancers featured at the beach volleyball tournament in Athens. Some female volleyball players are offended. I've watched bits of beach volleyball and I have to admit that it's hard to distinguish between the athletes and the dancers, because they are dressed almost identically. Let's compare: dancers; players. In fact, I think if a survey was conducted, you will find that many men really like female beach volleyball. The bikini dancers are just icing. Sorry, but that's just the way it is (I think). Oh, I was not referring to me when I said men.

Tags: bikinis, Olympics, beach volleyball

"Why not take your cat out for dinner?"

Meow Mix cafe has opened for business in Manhattan. Yes, you can take your cat out to dinner in New York. Associated Press reports: "The midtown restaurant serves Meow Mix packets for its feline customers with corresponding dishes to satisfy human palates. 'Deep Sea Delight' mackerel for cats is paired with tuna rolls for cat owners; 'Upstream Dream' salmon for felines corresponds with mini crab cakes for humans." I suppose that this is the next logical step after the launch of those bakeries for dogs, but really. Anyway, I am allergic to cats.

That's all I have to say today.

Oh, wait, I just finished watching both seasons of The Office. This is hilarious. I recommend it.

Tags: cats

Did you know that there is a town in Newfoundland called Dildo? I wonder how it is that I got this far in life without knowing that. This is perhaps the most fascinating piece of information to come my way in the last decade.

I cycled past a street busker playing the violin on my way home last night. Bizarrely, he was playing the Chicken Dance. Now, there is a composition that one normally hears only at wedding receptions, and it is generally those receptions that take place in church basements with very low ceilings. The last basement reception I went to featured the Chicken Dance and the Macarena, along with some pretty funky, and quite rural, line dancing

I've been 647ed. I changed cell phones and providers, for many reasons, and I am now stuck with a 647 area code. Suddenly, I feel like Elaine Benes. You know, she gets a number with a new area code, and then finds out that a woman in her building has died... I could go on, but if I really shouldn't have to explain Seinfeld to you. By the way, it's coming soon on DVD.

Damn, now I have the Chicken Dance playing in my head.

Tags: trivia, music, cell phones, bad music

Smoking on the Sidewalks

I love the smoking ban that is not in place in bars and restaurants in Toronto. There are still those cases of certain bars (like some near my house) which have morphed into "private social clubs", requiring membership. The ashtrays are still out in those places. I never figured out who would ever go into these places near my house anyway. They are filled with men, all older men, drinking and smoking. Women appear not to be welcome.

The ban has forced people out on the sidewalks. One thing that bothers me is that I have to walk through clouds of smoke on the sidewalks. It is really horrible. It seems to me that there are more people on the sidewalk than sitting is some bars on Bloor Street. And, the sidewalks are becoming a big ashtray. I really wish that smokers would not throw their butts on the ground. It is littering and it makes the city look disgusting. Besides, cigarette butts are not biodegradable. I say, we should ban smoking in all public places.

And now, I have the song Smokin' in the Boys Room on my brain.

Elvis died on this day. I always remember because it is my sister's birthday.

Tags: smoking, smokers

Commobore

I really feel sorry for all of those Canadian Idol wannabees. Imagine being forced to sing Lionel Ritchie songs. I can't decide which is worse: listening to the terrible songs or singing them. I had to cover my ears a few times. Oh, the horror. Besides, the whole program was a one hour advertisement for the boring man's new album of soporific disasters.

Bad as it was, it was more entertaining than watching Lionel's daughter, Nicole, make an idiot out of herself with Paris Hilton.

Tags: Canadian Idol, TV, Lionel Ritchie

Cheap DVDs

OK, so I was shopping in Walmart for camping stuff a while back and I stumbled on the video section. Man, do they have some cheap DVDs. How does $1.88 sound? It sounded too good to be true, but I bought some anyway. The results were mixed. On the positive side, I got a copy of Kansas City Confidential. This is a surprisingly good film. I faired less well on some others.

Abraxas is a terrible movie, so bad that I did not get past the five minute mark. Oddly, there are some positive reviews of this mess of a movie out there. I should have known. After all, it stars Jesse Ventura! I had hoped for a good scifi flick. Instead, I got a terrible, unwatchable piece of junk. I'd be happy to give this away for the cost of postage.

Honor Thy Father is based on a novel by Gay Talese. That, and the fact that it is a mob film, seemed to suggest that it would be good. The film has aged badly. It gets good reviews, but I found it difficult to watch. Maybe I will watch the rest some other time.

The best thing about Crash of the Moons is the theme song, which utilizes a Theremin. The movie is really three episodes of Rocky Jones, Space Ranger.

I found the camping equipment too.

Tags: DVDs, movies

The trouble with vacations is that they end. Fortunately, I like my job, and so I really don't mind returning to work. There are certain elements of my job that I love. It would be nice to not have to work. I think that I would make a good multi-millionaire. I have the perfect temperament for it. It really bothers me to hear about those people who win millions and then say that they wish they hadn't, that somehow their life was better before, that the money just gave them stress. Hey, if you have stress after winning the jackpot, just give all of your money to me. I'd love that kind of stress for a change. Besides the long list of things that I would buy, there is the long list of places to go and things to do. What I find even more fantastical is those winners who don't quit their jobs! Although I quite like my job, I'd be outta here in a nanosecond.

Tags: vacation, lottery

The Curse Continues

It always rains when I go camping. It never fails. I have considered renting myself out to forest fire fighters. Just put up a tent next to the fire, put me in it, and it will rain buckets. It's so bad that there are people who now refuse to go camping with me.

I went camping last week, and it rained. Beautiful blue sky changed to the deepest scariest black in a matter of minutes. The good news is that I am now an expert in packing away wet gear.

Many years ago, I camped at Cavendish in PEI. It rained so hard that several families were forced to sleep in their cars. Some tents blew down. Later, it rained on my tent in Nova Scotia. In the Annapolis Valley, rain gave way to freezing temperatures. During that trip, we were rained on in Quebec City and in all of the Maritime provinces. It did not rain on the two nights we took refuge in a hotel. I have also camped in the rain in Vermont, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, New York, etc. It may be time to sell the tent.

Tags: camping

Former Child Actor Dot Net

Wil Wheaton has a web site with lots of stuff. I am not really sure why I am passing this on. I am not a fan, I did not like his character in Star Trek: TNG, and I don't find his site that interesting. But, he does like Radiohead and the Pixies, so that's cool. And, I guess it's not his fault that the Trek writers gave him such a lame ass character. I often wonder if the sneer was an act, or if that was his default expression.

Tags: Wil Wheaton, celebrity blogs

Canadian Idol

Let me just say that I know the show is silly. It's ridiculous. My only excuse is that it's summer. I would never watch a show like this in winter. The results show is the worst, mostly because of the opening "number" which is cheesy, juvenile, and profoundly embarrassing. Personally, anyone who wins this talent contest is doomed.

I finally clued in to the show's demographic. Judging by the results, the viewers are either middle aged women or adolescent girls or both. How else can one explain the fact that Joshua Seller, the person with weakest, most nasal voice, and a disturbing resemblance to the Greatest American Hero, has made it into the final eight? On the other hand, Kaleb Simmonds was placed in the bottom three. He is light years ahead of anyone else in terms of voice and musicality. Those 2 million Canadian viewers are voting by looks alone. It's a popularity contest, not a music contest.

Tags: Canadian Idol, TV

TV on DVD

Since acquiring a DVD player a while back, I have been frequenting the DVD sections of various stores. In case you aren't aware, studios seem to be releasing everything in their archives on DVD. I have heard that studios are raking in buckets of cash from DVD sales. You can fins such things as the season one of the Flintstones and the Jetsons and even Wonder Woman (not that I would buy those, mind you). But, I am happy that Seinfeld is coming out. And, I am happy that the first season of Millennium is out. That was a brilliant show. I still cannot believe that Fox cancelled it, but then they have cancelled lots of shows that I like, such as Firefly, which is also out on DVD.

I recently bought the first season of MASH on DVD, mostly because I got it for an insanely low price. There are few special features on it: no retrospectives, no commentaries, and no other bonus stuff or fluff. The best thing about this DVD set is that you can watch the episodes without that insidious laugh track. Oh, and you get to see the episodes uncut. In syndication, networks cut out bits here and there to permit more advertising space. You will see scenes or parts of scenes that you may not have seen before.

I do think that many of these releases are a bit pricey. If you wanted all nine seasons of the X-Files (and let's face it, who wouldn't) you'd need to fork out about $900 plus tax. That's crazy.

Tags: TV, DVDs

Bedside Reading

Beside my bed are two books: a novel by Robert Bell and Freud's Introductory Lectures on Psycho-Analysis: A Course of Twenty-Eight Lectures Delivered at the University of Vienna (authorized English translation of the revised edition, Feb 1929). The pages are aging and a bit smelly. This book, along with The Interpretations of Dreams (again, in a very old edition) has been on a book case for years. Suddenly, I am drawn to them. I am not sure how far I will get.

Funny, the Blogger spell check wanted to replace Freud's with fraud's. Should I take that as a sign? Oddly, it accepted Freud.

Tags: reading

Mountain Gorillas

Did you know that there are fewer than 400 mountain gorillas left? They live in the mountain jungles of Zaire, Rwanda, and Uganda. Poaching and war are the causes. In other words, we are the cause. Sadly, they are candidates for the Frozen Ark project.

tags: gorillas

Road Rage

I am sick of road rage. Last week, I was walking across Yonge Street near Dundas. A car was about to turn right in front of me. It seemed to me that he was not going to stop, so I stopped. He slowed, then I began to walk, then I thought he wouldn't stop after all, so I stopped. Finally, he stopped. I stared into the windshield, but I really couldn't even see who was in there because of the glare. When I passed the passenger side of the car, I got a verbal barrage from the two people (a man and a woman). It went something like "fuck you; fuck off; fuck you; fuck off." What's wrong with people?

A year ago, I was riding up Dovercourt Road, south of Dundas. The road was narrow, and my backpack brushed the side mirror of a rusting pickup truck. I emphasize the word "brushed." In truth, I considered stopping and saying something to whomever was in the truck, but it just seemed ridiculous. Anyway, it was very busy, and so I was past College before they caught up to me.

Rubber tires squealed on the pavement. Two guys, whom I can only describe as microcephalic mesomorphs, jumped out of the truck. I was called, within the space of less than a minute, a fag, a faggot, a fag with glasses, a faggot with glasses, a stupid fuck, an asshole, a piece of shit, a jerk, a girl, a fuck head, etc., etc. (believe me, there were many more names). They clenched their fists. They told me that if they had "hit" me, I would have called the police. They threatened to call the police. All the while, they inched closer and closer.

It was the most obscene display of road rage I have ever seen. Why can't people treat other people the way in which they would like to be treated? Is that so hard?

Tags: road rage, cycling

Canadian Idol

I know you've been waiting for this. In my defense, I have to say that I got hooked again after watching the early shows. There is a good deal of comedy in these auditions. I only watch two reality shows, so that's not too bad, is it?

Brandy Callahan is out, and it is clear that the vote had nothing to do with talent. She is a better singer than Joshua Seller and Manoah Hartmann (not to mention Shane Wiebe). Trouble is, she is short and overweight. So, Canada is clearly voting for the attractive people first. It's a shame.

The show is ridiculous and anyone who wins should remember that it is a popularity contest based largely on how you look, rather than talent, not that there's too much of that in the show. If this show goes into a third season, I'll pass. Believe me.

Tags: Canadian Idol, TV

The Worst Song

I thought of entitling this entry "The Worst Song Ever Written", but I haven't heard them all. I also thought of "The Worst Song I have ever Heard", but I have heard lots of pure shite, and I don't know the titles or artists. So, this is called the worst song.

I was forced to thrown out entire genres, either because every song is terrible or because I know too little about them. For example, I am not qualified to comment on Country and Western, beyond the fact that I hate it (especially so-called new country by the likes of Shania Twain) , with the notable exception of The Streets of Laredo and a few Hank Williams Jr. songs.

All Hip Hop is now garbage. How can you take a genre seriously when most of its artists take the opportunity to turn their videos into television commercials? I know too little about gospel and jazz. Let's forget about easy listening. The whole thing is a joke.

So, I guess this should be The Worst Song that I am Familiar With, of The Worst Song with which I am Familiar. There are lots to choose from. A few things spring to mind immediately. These include Delta Dawn, Tie a Yellow Ribbon, Raise a Little Hell, anything by Olivia Newton John, all Disco, the entire top 40, all Spice Girls songs, and anything by Hanson, the Backstreet Boys, Styx, or Abba. Let's not forget the whole raft of teen stars, like Britney Spears, Debbie Gibson, etc.

So, here it is: my opinion of the worst song ever. Oh, I should say that I almost chose the jingle in the MarineLand TV commercial. They have used the same insipid piece of music since I was in diapers. Enough already. OK, so here it is... Oh, I should say that I almost chose We Will Rock You/We are the Champions by Queen. Both songs are embarrassing. Oh, and I almost choose Paradise by the Dashboard Lights by Meatloaf. Let's just say that he is a better actor than singer. I hate it. Also, I was this close to selecting Common People by Pulp. OK, so here it is: Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen.

Someone (you know who you are) told me that the song was never meant to be taken seriously. The problem is, those rabid Queen fans didn't understand, and they do take it seriously. These are probably people who think that they hate Opera and yet like this song for its ridiculous pseudo-operatic moments. Fans praise Freddy Mercury for his voice, which, let's face it, was not that good. I could go on, but I won't. I hate the song.

Tags: music, bad music, Queen

Texas and Sex Toys

This is hilarious. A Texan mother was recently charged with obscenity after selling a vibrator to her customers and explaining how to use it. It is legal in Texas to sell sex toys, as long as they are described as novelties. If instructions are provided, it is a criminal offense! The woman had faced up to a year in jail after she sold a vibrator at a private party to two undercover police officers posing as a married couple. Clearly, Texas police have nothing to do. The charges were eventually dropped because the country attorney felt that the case was a waste of resources.

Geroge W. Bush was Governor of Texas, so that explains a lot.

Tags: sex toys, Texas, George Bush

Eleanor Rigby

After letting the book sit with me for a while after finishing it, I can say that I did not like it. I don't see the book as a particularly literary effort. Douglas Coupland could be a good writer, but this book won't help to convince the unconvinced.

The most troubling part for me is the voice. The protagonist (Liz Dunn) is a fat woman who tells the story in the first person. The problem is that she has such a masculine voice. In fact, she has Douglas Coupland's voice. He can't seem to hide it very well. Her son (Jeremy) also has Douglas Coupland's voice.

The ending, which I gather is meant to be a surprise, is not so much a surprise as it is ridiculous.

It may seem like I am being harsh on Douglas Coupland. In truth, I have enjoyed some of his books. In Evelyn Waugh's The Ordeal of Gilbert Pinfold, the protagonist remarks (and I paraphrase): "All writers have only one good novel in them. The rest is just professional trickery. " I wonder if Douglas Coupland would accept that argument.

Tags: Douglas Coupland

Quentin Tarantino & Leonard Cohen?

It's true. Dance me to the End of Love, starring Mr. Tarantino. It's odd, but interesting. http://aarongoffman.com/danceme/

Tags: Quentin Tarantino, Leonard Cohen

I am at work, at my desk listening to Bruce Cockburn's In the Falling Dark. It's the new Deluxe Edition. I wish I could afford to replace all of my Cockburn CDs with these new ones. I picked up two, mostly because of the excellent price at Sam's. Sam's, by the way, used to be a good record store, before its bankruptcy. It's just not the same. Oddly, my credit card statement lists Sam the Record Man as Same the Record Man. I want to tell them that it is not the same, but would they listen? Anyway, the benefits of remastering are clear, and there are bonus tracks. I wish that someone would remaster the Leonard Cohen back catalogue and improve the inserts. I'd like better liner notes. Of course, then I would feel compelled to buy all the CDs again. I already have many on vinyl. If there is one defense for illegal downloading, it would be that many consumers have purchased their favourite artists many times on different formats, and in remastered editions. I have four copies of King Crimson's Discipline, for example, in various formats and editions. Surely, I have paid enough? Still, I have not downloaded any music illegally.

Trivia: my favourite web site is www.space.com.

Do you like bunnies? Do you like Cartoons? If so, be sure to check out Angry Alien Productions. They have 30 second re-enactments of Alien, the Exorcist, Titanic, and The Shining featuring cartoon bunnies. Really.

On a more serious note, I recommend Librarians Against Bush.

Tags: music, cool sites, cartoons

Ouch

Associated Press has reported that "An Englishman who shot himself in the groin after drinking 15 pints of beer and stuffing a sawed-off shotgun down his trousers was jailed for five years Tuesday for illegal possession of a firearm." I'd say shooting himself in the groin is punishment enough.

Saddam the Novelist

Saddam's new novel (his fourth) is entitled "Get Out, You Damned". His other are called "Zabibah and the King", "The Fortified Citadel" and "Men and a City". "Zabibah and the King" is set to become a twenty part television series, for Iraqi TV, despite the fact that his work has been called naive and superficial. Evidently, Saddam was writing this novel while he ignored defense preparations. Instead, he predicted that he would lead an underground movement hat would defeat the Americans. Clearly, he was delusional.

Tags: bizarre news, Saddam Hussein

Library School

OK, so here is my opinion of the Library Science program (at a large unnamed North American, ALA-accredited library school). It sucked. I can't believe that it is a masters-level program. I think that it was largely unacademic and boring.

Maybe I feel this way because I have a "real" masters degree (call me a snob if you must). Maybe it's just that the program was filled with busy work, work that was not very challenging. Maybe I don't know what I am talking about. It just seems to me that it was really not quite up to the standard of other masters programs. I know that some people will disagree with me. That's fine. This is just my opinion.

I recall one guy in the program referred to the MLS program as the "back door to academia." He might have been correct.

And now, on a completely unrelated topic, the only complaint I have ever had with Seinfeld is the pronunciation of the word clitoris. I know that there are two accepted pronunciations: one with the accent on the first syllable ('klit-&-r&s), and the other with the accent on the second (kli-'tor-&s), which makes it rhyme with Dolores. The latter just sounds stupid to me.

That's it for today.

Tags: Library School, MLS, English language, Seinfeld

Cunnilingus and Psychiatry

I think that the Sopranos is one of the best television shows of all time. We have just watched the first two seasons on DVD, with seasons three and four waiting. It is both hilarious and violent. You should watch. My favourite line so far has to be: "Cunnilingus and Psychiatry brought us to this." Of course, you'll have to watch to understand the statement.

Tags: Sopranos, TV

Union of Concerned Scientists

"UCS is an independent nonprofit alliance of more than 100,000 concerned citizens and scientists. We augment rigorous scientific analysis with innovative thinking and committed citizen advocacy to build a cleaner, healthier environment and a safer world."

This organization is fabulous. Check it out.

Tags: cool sites

I have seen people riding bikes and talking on cell phones, holding umbrellas, and using a PDA. Today, I passed a woman holding a cup of coffee. She looked a bit unstable, gripping her handle bars with one hand while she balanced her coffee in the other hand. It seems to me that both hands should be on the handle bars.

I figure if we want to get to Mars, we need to employ the best engineers possible. To me, that group must be toothbrush engineers. I swear that design improvements in toothbrushes rivals any other area. A new brush is described as "3-d brush and a measured toothpaste dispenser." Or, this: "A Glasgow dentist has been awarded £75,000 to develop a new toothbrush handle that increases control and cuts joint strain." Go here for a description of the fluid dynamics of sonic toothbrushes. Of course, another choice might be razor design. I am still waiting for a five-bladed razor.

Tags: cycling, toothbrushes

Multitasking

So, I stopped at a red light this morning, and, of course, a dozen cyclists raced through the intersection anyway. I had to pass them all again, and the same thing happened at the next traffic light. Anyway, I looked to my left and there was this guy behind the wheel of a Subaru shaving with a rechargeable electric razor. His rear view mirror was tilted so that he had a good view of his chin, and not the road behind him. Banning cell phones while driving might not be enough. It reminded me that I once saw a woman applying makeup while driving. Actually, I have seen women applying makeup in cafeterias, on the subway, and walking down the street. That just seems wrong to me.

Tags: cycling, driving

Weird. I just saw a guy walking down Yonge street eating raisin bran (with milk) out of a huge Tupperware (TM) container. This was at 1:00 in the afternoon. I've always felt that cereal was best consumed at home. That's why I have never (unlike Jerry Seinfeld) ordered cereal in a restaurant, although I did have a dream once in which I ate a chocolate bar with a knife and fork.

Tags: cereal, Yonge Street

Not all Cyclists are Idiots

Would it be fair to judge all automobile drivers based on the actions of a few, or even on the habits of taxi drivers? It seems to me that I, as a cyclist, am being prejudged every time I am on the road. Bad cyclists drive me crazy too, but I realize that not all cyclists are terrible and have no respect for the rules of the road.

It annoys me that a cop tried to ticket me for making a rolling stop at a stop sign when drivers do that all of the time and when most cyclists fail to even slow down. I made a right turn on a red light today, so slowly that I had to put my foot down. Pedestrians were walking faster than me, and this guy on the sidewalk said: "that's a red light." He must have issues with cyclists.

A few moments earlier, someone asked me for spare change. I said "sorry", and then she said: "no one in this city has any fucking manners!" The most amazing thing was that she articulated her i-n-g. She said fucking, not fuckin' and that made me almost wish that I had a few cents to give her.

Tags: cycling

More on Douglas Coupland

From my journal, Sept. 3, 1996:

"I finished Shampoo Planet some time ago. It was alright. It had its moments, to be sure. I have nothing much to say about it beyond that."

I am half way through my advance copy of Eleanor Rigby. I should just say ditto, and be done with it.

Tags: Douglas Coupland, reading

Thumbs Up!

I am sure we all remember those images of Iraqis greeting US tanks and giving them the Thumbs Up. The western media interpreted this gesture as a sign that the US troops were liberators. It turns out that thumbs up in the arab world (and other places) is equivalent to giving someone the finger. The US Army's Defense Language Institute thinks differently. It says "Middle Easterners of the Arabian Peninsula adopted this hand movement, along with the OK sign, as a symbol of cooperation toward freedom." I don't buy that explanation, especially given what has happened in Iraq since.

Tags: Iraq

I used to work in a hospital library. I hated it, for many reasons, and I'll never go back. My reference shifts were spent answering strange (and some not so strange) questions. After a boring and mentally exhausting shift, I wrote down a few questions that I had recently gotten on the reference desk (taken from an entry in my journal on April 10, 2000):

Where's the bathroom?
Where's the photocopier?
Why can't I use my U of T copicard in your photocopier?
Why doesn't your photocopier take coins?
Can I buy this book?
How much is this book?
Do you sell videos?
How do you spell Harvard?
What time zone are we in?
What is Level II, Section C?
Are you a doctor?
Are there any doctors on staff in the library?
How can you help me if you are not a doctor?
Can you read this article for me?
Where is San Antonio?
Can I use your email account?
Can I use your computer?
Please pay for these subscriptions and send them to my office. (not really a question, is it?)
Can you tell me the name of the green book I signed out last week?
Do you have any medical books?
Do you have any journals?

There were more, many more....

Tags: libraries, reference questions

So much for pollsters: they got it wrong.

I just finished reading Salamander by Thomas Wharton (review). I loved Icefields, his first novel, much better. I did like this one. Actually, I liked it quite a lot. But, there is something about it that I just can't put my finger on.

I have also recently read: Badlands by Robert Kroetsch; Going to New Orleans by Charles Tidler; Man of Bone by Alan Cumyn, and some others I can't remember right now.

Whenever I recall recent books read, I reflect on those that I hated. What is the worst book I have ever read? I have an answer, but I could be wrong. After all, I abandoned many books part way through. This group includes Larry's Party by Carol Shields. I know this book received tons of praise, but I think it is boring and badly written. I used to struggle through books I didn't like, but now I realize that there are far too many good books waiting. I regret the hours and hours I spent fighting my way through Douglas Coupland's Microserfs.

Microserfs, in my humble opinion, is the worst book ever written. Well, it is the worst book I have ever read all the way through. It stinks. It is boring and tedious, or, in the immortal words of Bart Simpson: "I didn't know it was physically possible, but this both sucks and blows."

I recently met Douglas Coupland: he signed an advanced copy of Eleanor Rigby. He is a nice guy. I liked a couple of his other books, but I think that Generation X is overrated. Maybe I read it too late. I am a Gen Xer, so I should have appreciated it.

Tags: reading, Douglas Coupland, Microserfs

Election Day

OK, so just a few comments on today's federal election...

I'd like to say, make sure you vote. But, if you plan to vote Conservative, forget about it. There has been much commentary on Stephen Harper's so-called "hidden agenda". Let's face it, it is not hidden. The Regressive Conservative party is anti-gay, anti-women, anti-middle class, anti-public health care. It the scariest party we have ever seen. How can we, especially people in Ontario, forget about the roots of this party? It is comprised of the remnants of failed regional parties and the tired and hopeless remains of the Progressive Conservative Party. The PC party ruined Ontario. If you are angry with Dalton, don't vote Conservative. Vote for anyone else, but not Conservative, please.

Tags: elections, Canada

Comments!-

I've added comments, at the advice of a friend. Maybe I will resume entries as well. Go forth and comment.

Tags: blogging

Happy Birthday to You

My daughter turns three years old today. She is very cute and very sweet.

Tags: family

Spalding Gray is Dead

I had hoped that he would just come back, like he had taken an unplanned vacation. Instead, they found his body in the East River. I am really saddened by this news.

Tags: Spalding Gray

Ten Stupid Things

Off the top of my head, a list of stupid things:

cigarettes
electric can openers
electric pencil sharpeners
the top 40
opinion polls
George W. Bush
milk
awards shows
leaf blowers
Stephen Harper

Tags: stupid things

I don't get it

The Liberals took a big hit in the polls after the sponsorship scandal hit the news. I would say that they deserved it. What I can't understand is why the support for the Conservative Party of Canada increased. This party has no leader; it is comprised of the remnants of two failed parties; it is dysfunctional. What about the NDP? Seriously. Jack Layton deserves a chance. Besides, the NDP supports the full decriminalization of marijuana. That's progressive.

Tags: sponsorship scandal, political parties

TDSB News

The Toronto District School Board is considering a plan that would cut the number of full- time librarians from 101 to 38. No secondary school within the system will be left with a full-time teacher-librarian! Some libraries may only stay open for 70 minutes per day!

This is scary. I find this inconceivable. I can't imagine how high school would be without consistent access to a library. Students have less and less understanding of how information is organized, and no idea how to access quality information.

Despite the fun we made of our high school librarian, I learned a lot from him. I am amazed that many third and even fourth year university students do now know how to find journal articles, and have no comprehension of the differences between books and journals. When I was a high school student, we would drive to the local University to get articles for our history papers. By the time I got to University, Historical Abstracts was a very familiar resource.

This budget cut, if it happens, will have serious repercussions.

Tags: librarians, Toronto District School Board

Get out of the Bike Lane

Why is it that Taxis are permitted to use shared lanes? You know, like the ones on Bay Street. These lanes are reserved for buses, taxis, and bicycles. Why? Taxis are no solution to pollution or road congestion. They drive around looking for fares, or else they are usually carrying ONE passenger. This sucks. In my opinion, these lanes should be reserved for buses and vehicles with three or more people inside. What I really think is that there should be bike lanes on more streets. And not like that idiotic bike lane on Spadina.

Get out of the bike lane!

Tags: cycling, Toronto

OCAD Building

I am amazed that some people dislike the new OCAD building. I think it's fabulous. If you walk down McCaul Street, you will notice that everyone is looking up at it. In fact, try not looking up. It's impossible. Toronto lacks radical architecture. We have little beyond an 1800-foot phallic symbol.

Tags: architecture, Toronto, OCAD

$$$

I have this urge to spend money, but no money to spend. It's the way things go. After buying a bunch of darkroom supplies, I am low on cash, until I get paid. I hate getting paid monthly. Whose invented monthly pay? I'd rather get paid weekly, or daily. After all, I work daily (usually).

Two friends have bought iPods. I have iPod envy.

Try This.

Tags: money

Winter Blahs, Spalding Gray, TV, etc.

I think I am getting sick of winter. The fall was so warm, and then January really sucked.

Well, it's been one month since Spalding Gray disappeared. I am still saddened by this news. My ex-girlfriend lent me her copy of Monster in a Box about eleven years ago. I still think this slim book is one of the funniest things I have ever read. There are serious themes in his work too.

We were fortunate to have seen him give a monologue in Toronto some years back. I had hoped to see him perform again. That doesn't look likely now.

We have seen two episodes of This is Wonderland on CBC. Hey, this show is pretty good. Somehow, I keep missing the new Rick Mercer show. Maybe I don't really care about it.

Does everyone have a friend that just won't stop sending email to you? It wouldn't be so bad, but it's just stupid jokes. It is frustrating.

Tags: Spalding Gray, TV

Breasts are dangerous to your health

Get this: some banker from Knoxville has filed a class action lawsuit against Janet Jackson, Justin Timberlake, CBS, MTV, and Viacom. Terri Carlin said the "sexually explicit conduct" caused millions of people to "suffer outrage, anger, embarrassment and serious injury."

Serious injury? If seeing a breast can cause serious injury, I'd be dead by now. Embarrassment? Say what? I wasn't embarrassed. Seeing breasts is not embarrassing. If it is, there is something wrong with you. This is probably the most ludicrous thing I have ever heard. Wait, weapons of mass destruction in Iraq comes close.

Meanwhile, many people have already commented on the Superbowl ads, which we are not allowed to see in Canada. If you ask me, a farting horse is far worse than a breast. I think that could really cause serious injury.

Tags: breasts, Janet Jackson, media

Janet Jackson's Right Breast

My immediate reaction is that, since her nipple was covered with a steel shield, it doesn't count. It's simple: if you can't see the nipple, it's not really nudity. Anyway, what a huge fuss about absolutely nothing. It just figures that the puritanical right wing conservative religious types would freak out over a breast. It's just a breast. Violence dominates North American television and movies. You can watch people die, being tortured, decapitated, etc., but a breast makes people have a seizure. Give it a rest.

Tags: Janet Jackson, breasts, media

I spent three days at the Ontario Library Association conference. It wasn't too bad. The trouble with every conference is that, inevitably, you will chose a stinker session. In small sessions, I worry that the speakers will be offended if I were to walk out. Can you enter a new session already in progress? If so, when is it too late? I witnessed people entering sessions during the ending question part. What's up with that?

Anyway, I saw some good sessions and some bad (I won't name names). Top Ten Tech Trends is always interesting. The occasional free beverage was even better. My suggestion is that they reconfigure the conference to run from Wednesday to Friday, and leave Saturday out of it. That, in my mind, is the major flaw of every library conference.

Tags: Ontario Library Association, conferences, libraries

I think downloading music sucks. I don't understand why people want to get music this way. Forrester Research is predicting that Compact Discs will disappear in five years, and that virtually all music will be purchased from online stores. Maybe I am a Luddite, but I would hate this arrangement.

As we know, downloaded music offers no improvement in sound over CDs. You get no liner notes, no lyrics, no production details, no artwork. Instead, you are responsible for archiving the music. You will keep needing larger hard drives. I have had a hard drive failure. I wouldn't want to have to repurchase all of that music. I have 1200+ CDs.

SACD and DVD audio offer better sound quality than CDs. Surely, music lovers should prefer better sound quality over ease of downloading. It irritates me when I hear people complain that they shouldn't have to buy a whole CD for just one song. If you only like one song from an artist, you shouldn't be a fan. You've been duped.

Downloading isn't more economical. Some online stores are selling songs for 99 cents each. The last Radiohead CD has 14 tracks. 14 times 99 cents is just about what I paid for it, and I have the disc, and the artwork, and I don't have to worry that I will erase the songs, or that my hard drive will crash. And, yes, I like all of the music on the CD, not just one song. I predict that the 99-cent model will soon disappear. We will be paying a lot more than 99 cents in the future.

What I'd like to know is if on online store would sell Brian Eno's Thursday Afternoon for 99 cents. It is, after all, a 61-minute song.

I have downloaded lots of legal music, so that I can hear new musicians. That, to me, is the value of downloads. If I want the music, I will buy it.

I'll take a CD any day. Forrester says that within five years, CDs will be things that only old people have. I guess I am old.

Tags: downloading, CDs

I love cycling in winter. Today, the wind chill is -22 celsius, and the snow is blowing. However, we are in for ice pellets tomorrow morning. I may have to skip a day. It would be one of a handful of missed days in the last five or six years.

I like to cycle because I hate the TTC. The TTC is overpriced, if you ask me. It is crowded. People walk slowly. Fresh air (and exercise) is the better way.

I haven't had much to say lately. I guess I've be concentrating on playing the guitar and taking pictures. I'll be back in the darkroom on Thursday.

Tags: cycling, TTC

Spalding Gray is missing. This is sad news. This article presents the recent facts. What can I say about him, expect that he always amazed me with his humour and brutal honesty? He has made a personal industry out of describing his personal life, including an affair, something that I think was rather brave. I hope he is found in good health.

Tags: Spalding Gray

Wow, it's been ages since my last entry. I just suffered through the flu, or something very flu-like. It was a killer. I couldn't get out of bed for three days and I ate virtually nothing for four days. It's not like I need to lose weight.

I think that my Lomo LC-A is broken. Yes, I am irritated. It's overpriced, thanks to that ridiculous marketing machine in Austria. This should be a cheap camera. It is made cheaply, and it has a limited life-span. I am not going to replace it.

Tags: flu, Lomo, photography

Every doctor should be compelled to read Dr. Andrew Malleson's "Whiplash and Other Useful Illnesses." This is a fascinating book by a true skeptic. I, like the vast majority of others, thought that whiplash and the other "fashionable illnesses" were real and serious. This book opened my eyes.

Tags: whiplash, reading

The Decline of Radio

Do you remember when radio was good? Maybe you are not old enough. I remember when there were lots of independent radio stations. Now, national or multinational companies own something like 80% of North American radio stations. Corus Entertainment owns 24 radio stations in Ontario, 13 in Quebec, and 16 in western Canada! (plus 13 television stations).

This cannot be good for radio. I remember when Q-107 and CFNY (now totally eviscerated and renamed the Edge) used to be very different stations. Today, very little separates them. The so-called Edge spins "new rock" (usually pointless and wrongly categorized as alternative) while Q-107 delves into oldies and occasionally, some rather terrible rock.

Fans of CFNY should visit the Spirit of Radio fan site.

I rarely listen to the radio, but when I do, I usually listen to the last remaining independents, like the University of Toronto's CIUT and Ryerson CKLN.

Tags: radio, Corus

Leaf blowers are stupid.

Tags: leaf blowers, stupid things

The architect is coming. The library is planning a reno. If we can only get more windows, I'll be happy.

In the darkroom last night, I developed two rolls of Kodak HIE. Later, I printed a few images. I am pleasantly surprised with the results. The next step will be to make some large prints. 8x10 seems really small for landscapes. This film gives far better results than Konica's pseudo-infrared film.

Tags: renovations, libraries, photography

Favourites

I've noticed that people with blogs often list their favourite stuff -- movies, books, music -- and other important stuff. Here's a small effort.

Movie: too hard to narrow it down.

Book: Hmm, tough one - maybe "Gargantua and Pantagruel" or "The Brothers Karamazov." There are so many to choose from. I am currently reading "Black Dogs", by Ian McEwan.

Music: my favourite singer/songwriter is Leonard Cohen., with John Cale being a close second. I like Nike Drake, Tom Waits, Richard Thompson, Billy Bragg, Bruce Cockburn, Beck, Adrian Belew, David Bowie, Bob Mould, Lou Reed, Neil Young, Jeff Buckley, and others. I am a fan of Brian Eno, Labradford, Bill Laswell, Set Fire to Flames, Godspeed You! Black Emperor, Fly Pan Am, Do Make Say Think, Harld Budd, Steve Reich, Philip Glass, as well as XTC, Rheostatics, Velvet Underground, Bauhaus, Radiohead. I am missing people.

Colour: black

TV: Alias, DaVinci's Inquest, Simpsons, Star Trek...

Time of year: spring

Food: Indian

In case of fire, what will I remember to take with you: my old journals, photos

What's under my bed: dust

How many times have I been in love: what's love?

What's on my desktop: Mondrian painting

First car: Pontiac Ventura

I cycle year round. I like toy cameras. I hate Microsoft.

Tags: favourites, reading, music

Politics and Music

I guess I should never discuss politics with co-workers. That is, if I am not sure where they stand on the political spectrum, I should avoid it. Today, I learned that a colleague voted for John Tory. I voted for David Miller. In his email, he said: "Miller is an NDPer....who would in their right mind ever want to vote for the NDP?" I told him I would and did and have in the past. He also wants the Olympics to come to Toronto, and he bought into Tory's right wing law and order campaign. We disagree about music too, so I guess I should have expected this.

Speaking of music, I finally acquired a copy of Tabla Beat Science - Live in San Francisco. I also picked up a Set Fire to Flames CD. It is awesome. I think the Montreal scene is fabulous. Do Make Say Think, Godspeed You! Black Emperor, Fly Pan Am, Exhaust, and others are making some really interesting music. Check out Constellation Records for great music and some really artistic packaging.

I recently dug out a couple of Quarkspace CDs from my collection and had a listen to Spacefolds 6 and Spacefolds 7. It's been a while since I gave them a spin, and I have to say that I still like most of their music. There are bits that don't do it for me, but I really think that they made some cool music.

Tags: elections, Toronto, politics, music

It's Friday. I know that it comes once per week, but it seems to take forever for it to arrive. This weekend, I am heading into High Park with my camera and some high-speed black and white infrared film. I am in the midst of photographing trees. I processed three rolls of Tri-X last night, and I like the results. I think I have some good images. I also spent some time in the studio, experimenting with lighting.

The Pentagon has begun recruiting for local draft boards. This is unbelievable. The US military is stretched thin by the stupidity in Iraq. I am not overwhelmed by Bush's intellect. I am not sure he has any. The US is getting bogged down in Iraq, and there is a notice on the defence department's Defend America website asking Americans to serve on draft boards. Is Iraq becoming another Viet Nam? Hopefully, a new US president will do the right thing and get the hell out of Iraq.

Tags: photography, Iraq

I do not work in a libary, or a lieberry. I am not a libarian, or even a Liberian. Is library such a hard word to pronounce? I sat through a three-hour presentation and the instructor, from a major telecommunications firm, kept saying lieberry, as if it were some sort of fruit.

Does anyone else think that it stinks that John Tory received an endorsement, which he accepted, from the Toronto Police Association? This is in contravention to the Police Act, and probably illegal. He wants to hire 400 policemen at a time when crime rates are dropping. We don't need another tough on crime campaign. It stinks. His ties to Mike Harris are so clear, I am amazed that anyone in Toronto would even consider voting for him.

Tags: librarians, elections, Toronto, police

Last night's Mayoral debate proved once again that John Nunziata is a goof. He should have taken the money. John Tory has the perfect last name. He is such a tory. I don't understand why he is running second in this campaign. We just got rid of the provincial conservative government! Some people in this city can't get enough abuse, it seems. Barbara Hall is boring. I am still going to vote for David Miller.

Tags: elections, Toronto

Dolly for Dinner

The FDA thinks that cloned meat is safe. It's already hard enough to buy real food. We have irradiated food, genetically-modified food, foods soaked with pesticides, and animals pumped up with antibiotics. In the future, it seems that we will have cloned meat in the stores.

I imagine that the specials interest groups will try their best to avoid labeling, just as they have done with GMOs. I think current food labeling legislation sucks. Ingredients of ingredients aren't labeled. Ever wonder what is in such innocuous sounding items like spices, natural flavouring, artificial flavouring, etc.? Even some manufacturers don’t know because they purchase these products form other suppliers. Since they account for less than 5% of the product, there are no disclosure requirements.

One of my favourite sites is Truth in Labeling. It focuses on the MSG, and how it is hidden in many foods. Gluten, a toxic substance to those suffering from Celiac Disease, is also hidden in many products.

Tags: cloning, food

Hallowe'en

When you have a kid, Hallowe'en is different. It reminded me of my childhood. I am also reminded of the parties I went to in high school and University. Those were the days. This year, our two-year-old ventured to a few more houses. She quickly clued-in. "Let's go trick or treating at that house," she said, and "let's knock on that door.". At the beginning, it was fine to visit the houses of people we knew. They learn fast.

My other enduring memory of Hallowe'en was wearing a winter coat over my costume. It snowed many years. This year, we had fabulous weather,. I walked around with her in a short-sleeved shirt.

We got the pumpkin early and, of course, the little one couldn't wait to carve it. The first face was too scary, so we added a second face at the back. As Hallowe'en approached our Janus-faced pumpkin started to decay and rot. In my mind, we had the perfect pumpkin. The insides had turned black, the rear face collapsed and looked like an eighty year old with no teeth. It was the scariest pumpkin on the street. My fingers punctured the sides when I picked it up to carry it to the composter the next day.

Tags: Halloween, parenting

I am half way through JM Coetzee's Youth, a book that follows from the point where Boyhood left off. It is spare and engaging. There is anguish and a palpable feeling of loneliness in this work. Reading Boyhood would seem to be a prerequisite. I recommend all of his books, especially Disgrace.

Tags: reading, JM Coetzee

$5.6 Billion

The Provincial Tories are liars. Thank god they got their asses kicked out of office.

Tags: elections, Ontario

Thank god we are almost rid of Mel Lastman. He is an embarrassment to the city. Please vote for David Miller so that we can stop the expansion of the Island Airport. It's a stupid idea. Who wants jets screaming around the waterfront? Expanding the Island Airport will kill the waterfront. Barbara Hall seems to think that people who live downtown don't use Pearson. That statement puts her in the same league as Mel the buffoon. It's an idiotic statement.

Tags: elections, Toronto

The United Right

At least they choose a better name this time. The Conservative Party of Canada sounds a lot better (if you ignore the Conservative part) than the previous attempt. The best they could do was come up with the Canadian Conservative Reform Alliance Party, or Ccrap. Talk about a perfectly named party.

Does this mean that the regional politics of the old Reform Party is dead? After all, Preston Manning launched the Reform party to advance regional interests. Soon, he realized that the rest of Canada wasn't buying it. Changing the name to the Canadian Alliance Party accomplished little, and attracted few converts from the PC party. So, now the remnants of the once popular Progressive Conservative Party have hooked up with the failed Alliance in the hopes of preventing another Liberal majority.

I don't think they have a chance. For that, I am thankful.

Tags: elections, Conservative Party

I lost part of my tripod. Damn. This is the perfect excuse to buy a new and better one. My Nikon FM decided to start misbehaving. At 1/1000, the shutter fails (I actually typed shitter, but decided to change it). I am left with half frames, or quarter frames. This was a problem that had been fixed. I had to dig out my back-up SLR for fast shutter speeds.

Tags: photography

Goin' to California

I'd like too. Let's take a close look at some of the top ten in votes received. At number 10, we have Mary Carey, an adult film actress. Larry Flynt checked in at number 7. What's going on out there? And then there's Gary Coleman, the pathetic, bankrupt little funny man, who finished 8th. This is even more bizarre than The Terminator being elected, and it is even funnier than any Letterman top ten.

Tags: California, elections

The Life of Pi

I liked The Life of Pi. And, I accept Yann Martel's view that ideas can be borrowed. He clearly acknowledged borrowing this idea from Moacyr Scliar. Martel will win this lawsuit, if it ever gets that far.

I think I agree with some reviewers who argue that the water part could have used an edit. And, I think, in some respects, that the first part was more interesting. However, from a narrative point of view, I think most people have missed the essence of the book: it doesn't matter which story you believe because the author makes it clear that both never happened, even in the fictional world. In the end, the Japanese insurance guys prefer the story of the tiger, because it is a better story. I think that we can assume that the story, as a fiction, never happened, that the fiction is a fiction, that the fictitious author created the fictitious character to tell us two stories. In the end, it makes no difference which story is the right one, because they are both stories.

I know it sounds convoluted, but do you know what I mean?

Tags: reading

A few months back, I removed the 6x45 mask in my Holga so that I could shoot squares. I am happy with the results, although I think that I may need to buy another Holga for when I am in a rectangular mood. Also, I think my lens is a bit too sharp. Some images rival my ancient Nikon in clarity. (by the way, I think these auto-everything cameras are over-rated, unless you happen to be a journalist or a sports or nature photographer).

I just loaded a roll of film into my Akira. This is a ridiculous camera. It even comes with a lens hood. Don't pay more than a few dollars for this one. You can see it for sale on the web from $40 to $69 US. Forget it. It's worth far less than that. I got mine free.

I have lots of other cameras: Lomo, Lubitel 166U, and a bunch of classic Russian Rangefinders.

Tonight, I plan to process a couple of rolls of Tri-X.

Tags: Holga, photography

First, the Tories had this to say about the Liberal Leader: "Dalton McGuinty. He's an evil reptilian kitten-eater from another planet." Now, with the election all but lost, Ernie says that Dalton has a "sharp pointy head." Thank you Ernie for revealing your true mental age. You are stuck at ten years old. I guess you figured that since you have lost, you should act like a loser. Well done. And, let's not kid ourselves, he knows he is toast. Ernie even referred to the Liberal party as the Liberal Government. And, Mike Harris said he was planning to vote for the Liberal party. He claims he made a mistake, but he's not fooling me.

Tags: elections, Ontario

Does anyone else think that the three guys running for Ontario Premier have odd names? We have Ernie, Dalton, and Howard. OK, so Howard is not that strange, it's just a bit boring. Ernie? Well, it reminds me of Sesame Street. I can't see how anyone can have any respect for a leader called Ernie. He should just wear a striped shirt and be done with it. Dalton? The only other had Dalton I am aware of is (was) Dalton Camp. Does any nation have room for more than one Dalton?

Tags: elections, Ontario

Man, they are dropping like flies: Robert Palmer, Warren Zevon, John Ritter, Johnny Cash, George Plimpton, Elia Kazan. It makes me feel mortal.

Tags: death

Waiter Boy Wins Canadian Idol (my last word on Canadian Idol)

Congratulations to Ryan, winner of the manufactured-pop-idol-of-the-moment award. The fact that this was the most popular Canadian television show of all time is depressing and alarming. What is the viewing demographic anyway? I imagine that those people drooling over Ryan are either pre-pubescent girls or middle-aged women? Am I wrong?

He was not the best singer. Gary Beals could out sing him, and so could Billy Klippert. But, I suspect that Billy is thanking his lucky starts that he didn't win. He was saved the embarrassment of having to sing that inane piece of fluff that will be the first single. It's an abysmal example of song writing. It's boring, stupid, and, as Farley Flex said, "Walt Disney-esque." Is that the best they can do?

Oh, and how the hell did Tyler Hamilton get into the top 11? He is the most nasal singer I have ever heard. He has zero musical skill. He makes me cringe.

That's enough on that topic. Let's hope that the worldwide Idol craze dies very soon.

Tags: Canadian Idol

http://911digitalarchive.org/

Tags: 911

Love You Forever makes me puke.

My dislike of Robert Munch's children's book "Love you forever" is total. I wondered if it was intended to be some kind of dark comedy. In some ways, it is very funny, and I laughed the first time I read this story about the most dysfunctional mother-son relationship ever portrayed in children's literature. The last segment where the grown man sneaks into his mother's house to cradle his elderly mother in his arms is perverse and freaky. If one reads this book seriously, it is downright creepy. Has the author never heard of privacy? Perhaps there is something else going on. A few pages earlier, it is the psycho/stalker/mentally unstable mother who drives across town with a ladder strapped to the roof of her car. She climbs the ladder to sneak into her son's bedroom, crawls across the bedroom floor, and rocks him in her arms. I wonder what the man's wife had to say about that. Creepy is too kind a description of this bizarre book.

The scariest thing about the book is that it has sold 15,000,000 copies! What's wrong with you people?

If you don't believe me, believe my daughter. She will bring the book over and ask me to read it to her (I guess she is an eternally optimistic two-year-old). Part way through, she will beg me to stop. "I don't like that one," she says. In ten or fifteen tries, we rarely get past the first three or four pages, and I am relieved when she says she doesn't like it.

Oh, and the art sucks too.

Tags: Robert Munch, Children's Literature

The fact that Arthur Koestler has faded into relative obscurity, while contemporary authors, such as George Orwell, are well-known, has always baffled me. In addition to Koestler's fiction masterpiece, Darkness at Noon, he wrote on a wide range of topics, managing to be controversial, entertaining, and very original. His volumes of autobiography are considered by many to be among the best of the 20th century. Some may remember that the Police used the title of Koestler's Ghost in the Machine for one of their albums.

I had high hopes for David Cesarini's biography (Arthur Koestler: The Homeless Mind). While it does cover Koestler's life in detail (some of it excruciating), it renders Koestler as a sex-obsessed drunk and possibly a rapist. We need more scholarship on Koestler, and so this book is welcome. But, I am ambivalent about the book and am left to ponder its purpose. Reaction has been mixed. Edinburgh University moved his statue to a safer location, fearing vandals would deface it after having reading about Koestler's attitude to women.

In hindsight, I regret not tallying the car crashes and the mistresses. Both lists would be very very long. His appetite for sex somehow managed to keep pace with his ability to seduce or persuade. I agree that these details are necessary, and it reveals Koestler to be very much unlike the man I had imagined. However, these forays into drunken parties and the endless stream of girlfriends almost overshadow the portrait of the man as a very influential thinker, and author of some of the most important books of his time. I got the hint that Koestler was a terrible driver (largely because of his drinking) early in the book. Why do we need descriptions of his serial automobile accidents?

Overall, the book is a remarkable portrait of a man who deserves more scholarly attention. It's probably the best book we will get on Koestler for a long time.

Tags: Arthur Koestler, David Cesarini

Election Fever

Finally, we get the chance to get rid of the Tory government in Ontario. The Common-Sense revolution is dead. It made no sense anyway. I hope the people of Ontario will see through the Conservative Party's self-serving promises, like the $500 per year mortgage interest deduction. They have to be kidding. They know the only way they can hope to win is to offer stupid incentives like that, while they continue to dismantle public education and destroy the health care system. The electrical system is a mess. I say, vote Public Power. It's the only real choice. The NDP has a real platform that makes sense: public health care, public education, public water, public hydro, reasonable tuition, a fair minimum wage, affordable housing, good pensions, public transportation, child care. By contrast, the Tory platform is a carrot on a stick.

Tags: elections, Ontario

CD Prices Falling

The good news is that Universal is slashing CD prices by approximately 30%. EMI shares immediately plummeted. This is the best news I have heard in long time. CD prices are artificially high, and I feel like I have be robbed over the years. Don't forget that recent class action suit. I did not turn to illegal downloading. I think there is a strong collector in me (perhaps that is why I am a librarian). I am looking forward to other companies matching or beating these prices. It's about time. Now, I wonder if there are any good artists in the Universal catalogue...

Tags: music, CDs

Music

I have no top ten lists. I don't have a fav song or band or singer or movie or tv show or book. Is that weird? I used to. Years ago, I could list my top ten songs, just like that guy in High Fidelity. What was in the top spot? Well, I remember thinking that Bela Lugosi's Dead by Bauhaus was awesome. I still appreciate that one. I went through a phase where I really identified with How Soon is Now?, but didn't everybody? And then there was Kate Bush, Lou Reed, John Cale, The Clash, Brian Eno, Joy Division, Adrian Belew, My Bloody Valentine, The Pogues, The The, XTC, Shriekback, The Cure. Now, I listen to Labradford, Godspeed You Black Emperor!, Do Make Say Think, Bill Laswell, etc. I gave up on the 3 minute pop song a long time ago. I have almost had it with lyrics, unless they are good ones, like those of Leonard Cohen, Bruce Cockburn, and Jeff Buckley.

If we go way back, into my pre-adolescent days, I was into Alice Cooper, Led Zeppelin, and Black Sabbath. It was the legacy of my older brother, and I find that I still have a softspot for the Zeppelin. I even bought all of their CDs.

Tags: music

Canadian Idol sucks

After being somewhat amused by the first few episodes of Canadian Idol, mostly because of the parade of truly terrible singers (who can forget Konnichiwa by Tarcisio Tancredi?), I have to say that the show has degenerated into a complete disaster. It is based on the flawed premise that a good voice is all one needs to be a star. There is no interest in talent. It's clear that the producers think that Celine Dion and Mariah Carey are talented!

The show's producers should have paid more attention to Global TV's Popstars. Where are the winners now? I saw Sugar Jones CDs in the delete bin (where they belong).

Some of my favourite singers have weak or unusual voices. I refer to people like Leonard Cohen, Tom Waits, Neil Young, Billy Bragg, Lou Reed, and Bob Dylan, none of whom would have had a chance of winning a contest like Canadian Idol.

I think Jake and Farley's criticism of Gary Beals said everything. He didn't sing the song exactly like Percy Sledge, so it was a bad performance. In other words, they want singers who imitate the artist they are covering. So much for artistic license.

Tags: Canadian Idol

Lord of the Rings Makes me Sleepy

OK, so I watched the first two movies (part of 'em) on video, which, I realize, is not the same as the full theatre experience. I fell asleep during both with more than one hour left in each movie. The first time, several months ago, I thought it was one of those things. But, there can be little doubt that the Lord of the Rings bores me silly. It may be the most boring film ever. Is it just me? Maybe it would have helped if I had read the books. I fear that would also put me to sleep. If I ever get insomnia, I'll just make a trip to the video store.

Tags: Lord of the Rings, movies

Blogging & Philip Roth

I am new to Blogging, but not new to keeping a journal. In the last 10 years, I have written over 6000 pages, filling up 30 hardbound black books, the ones intended for artists to sketch in. I wanted acid-free paper. I wanted the words to last, to outlive my children and me. I can't say why, really.

Like many people, I have a built-in censor. And, now I wonder what the reaction will be when my descendants read them (if I haven't burned them by then). It worries me. Of course, there is the distinct possibility that my handwriting will be indecipherable.

I feel even more inclined to censor myself here, where anyone can read these words. Maybe I will relax after some time.

I am reading Philip Roth's Sabbath's Theater. This novel is not for everyone. It is sexually explicit, maybe deviant -- but not by my standards ;-) -- and very funny. Sabbath is a gargantuan character, and I can't but feel that I am reading a modern Rabelais. I rank Gargantua and Pantagruel as one of my all time favourite books. I am also reminded of The Confederacy of Dunces, perhaps because of the extreme nature of the protagonist. In both cases, these are larger than life individuals. Sabbath's Theater is a wild and entertaining book, but, despite the sex, it may not be erotic.

Tags: blogging, journaling, reading, Philip Roth

"Hey Homo"

Is Sesame Street putting hidden messages in its CDs? Listen to Elmo and the Orchestra, and find out for yourself. Since my daughter adores this CD (which received the 2001 Grammy award for Musical Album for Children) I have heard it countless (and I mean countless) times. I am tired of it.

But, there is no longer any question in my mind that Big Bird says "Hey homo" when Elmo comes to visit. Just what is Sesame Street trying to do? Perhaps this is a response to all of those people who have long believed that this little red friend is a little gay friend.

Tags: Sesame Street, Elmo, Big Bird

Milk

Milk (cow's milk, that is) has to be the most disgusting "food" ever. I haven't touched the stuff (or cheese, butter, ice cream, etc.) for four years, and I feel much better because of it. Think about it. This is the breast milk of a hairy 2000 pound animal! Why do we drink it? I think it comes down to marketing. The various dairy marketers would have you believe that milk is essential. Why should it be? Humans are the only species that drink milk as adults and, not only that, we drink the milk of animals. It makes no sense.

From Dr. Benjamin Spock:

"Cow's milk in the past has always been oversold as the perfect food, but we are now seeing that it isn't the perfect food at all and the government really shouldn't be behind any efforts to promote it as such."

Believe me, dairy marketers are lying, and nutritionists have been duped. Milk is bad for you. There are countless scientific articles attesting to that. Search Medline, if you don't believe me.

From Dr. Robert M. Kradjian:

"To my thinking, there is only one valid reason to drink or use milk products. That is just because we simply want to. Because we like it and because it has become part of our culture. Because we have become accustomed to its taste and texture. Because we like the way it slides down our throat. Because our parents did the very best they could for us and provided milk in our earliest training and conditioning. They taught us to like it. And then probably the very best reason is...ICE CREAM! I've heard it described, ...'to die for'."

I could rant about milk for days. I would be happy if we just stopped promoting it as a health food. It's not and it never has been.

Tags: milk

Take a Survey

Someone wants to know what non-librarians think of libraries and librarians. Take the survey.

Tags: librarians, libraries

Ambient Ping

Last night, I attended the Ambient Ping's 4th Anniversary Special at the Nia Club @ C'est What? featuring ARC with Pholde and General Chaos Visuals. The combination of ARC and Pholde seemed to go well beyond "ambient" perhaps drifting into ambient mayhem, if there is such a thing as that.

Pholde uses scrap metal -- saw blades, files, angle iron, etc. -- to create a miasma of noise. This, against Baker's slightly Frippy guitar loops and some tribal rhythms kicked out of the drum kit, created a wall of intense, repetitive, and very compelling sound.

I was able to pick up a couple of CDs from the Ping Things boutique.

More great music is upcoming at the Ping, including Psychosomatic Climax Machine. Check out the schedule.

Tags: Ambient Ping, music

It's been a while. Since my last post, we have put a new roof on the house, taken a vacation and had the kitchen torn apart (it is still in disarray). One room is about to get new drywall, plus some much needed electricity. Ah, yes, electricity. The blackout blacked out the last part of my vacation. We spent 41 hours and 10 minutes without power. I thought that they had forgotten us, until CBC mentioned our neighbourhood on the air. A flood in a transformer building (or something) extended our outage.

I admit that I have been watching Canadian Idol. I got hooked during the first episode. I couldn't believe that people with zero talent could attempt to pass themselves off as real singers. It was painful to watch and sometimes hilarious. For a brief moment, I felt that I could do better. Who knows?

Recently, I have read:

Oxygen, by Andrew Miller (excerpt)
Portrait of an Artist as an Old Man, by Joseph Heller (review)
Spadework, by Timothy Findley (interview)
Travels by Night, by Douglas Fetherling
Gone Indian, by Robert Kroetsch (essay)
Tomorrow in the Battle Think on Me, by Javier Marias (review)

Later.

Tags: renovations, reading, blackout, Canadian Idol