Overrated, part 9 of 10

(see: parts 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8)

I was thinking about alternate careers lately, and I realize that it is probably too late to really switch careers, but if I could, I would choose astronomy or psychiatry.

Yesterday morning, the doctor lasered the retinal tear in my left eye. I wouldn't have described the procedure on the right eye as painful, but the left was a different story. Evidently, the tear was very close to a nerve and, man oh man, did that hurt. It felt like someone was repeatedly sticking a red hot poker into my eye and it continued to hurt for the rest of the day. The only other thing that painful, is listening to Queen, my number 2 overrated act.

2) Queen - Brian May is probably a good guitarist, but I am more impressed with his academics. Did you know that he recently finished his Ph.D. in astronomy? His dissertation is entitled: A Survey of Radial Velocities in the Zodiacal Dust Cloud. He has also published a couple of articles and co-authored a book entitled "Bang! – The Complete History of the Universe." That's cool, right? But, how weird is it that he would end up in a band with someone called Freddie Mercury? What are the chances of that happening?

It should be no surprise to see Queen on this list. After all, I chose Bohemian Rhapsody as the worst song ever to the dismay of at least one person. I find is especially bizarre that many Queen fans take this song seriously, as I have already discussed. I violently hate Queen's fake operatic crap. Let's have a closer look at some Queen songs.

Another One Bites the Dust - disco crap.

Flash - This has to be an ironic song. It's very gay, not that there's anything wrong with that. The song just makes me have gay thoughts - you know, Buck Rogers in tights and all that. "Flash a-ah Saviour of the Universe!"

Under Pressure - How disappointing that Bowie brought back this piece of garbage to his concerts. I had to suffer through it the last time I saw him. Bowie even managed to find a woman with Freddie's voice to do the Freddie's parts.

Somebody to Love - More fake opera. "Got no feel, I got no rhythm" I imagine this song being featured in a ballet of lepers.

Bicycle Race - Just go ride your bike, and don't sing about it!

Fat Bottomed Girls - Why does anyone like this one? Please tell me. I need to know.

Crazy Little Thing Called Love - This has to be the greatest rockabilly failure ever. "I gotta be cool relax, get hip, Get on my tracks, Take a back seat, hitch-hike, And take a long ride on my motor bike, Until I'm ready, Crazy little thing called love." Dumb and the video is even dumber.

Radio Gaga - The insipid lyrics say it all:

All we hear is radio ga ga
Radio goo goo
Radio ga ga
All we hear is radio ga ga
Radio blah blah

The video borrows heavily Metropolis.

We Will Rock You/We Are the Champions - Overplayed and underdone. But, go back to that album, News of the World, and cue up Sheer Heart Attack, Fight from the Inside, Sleeping on the Sidewalk, and Get Down, Make Love and you will discover that Queen had a small number of sort of OK songs. That's it, really: the rest are abominations. Have a look at their greatest hits CD and you will see what I mean. It should be called Greatest Failures.

A not-so-bad Queen song:


See: part 10